I have come to the present conclusion (always on the move) that the most valuable learning takes place when we take the highest risk that we believe we can take.
Based on the result we re-assess ourselves, if we succeed our self-esteem goes up.
When we take great risks for us and we succeed then our self-esteem goes ski high.
Take a very 'safe' risk and it goes up very little.
Take no risk (do as we're told/watch tele) and it can go down and we become depressed and try to console ourselves that we are OK - Go out and buy something - eat something special, drink. (Is this why we're a consumer society, obese, drug dominated, sex crazed ?)
I'm beginning to understand why I hated the thought of safe social networking sites/clubs. They can present such a small challenge - we can play it safe with relationships that we can ditch if things go slightly unpleasant. Reading an educational magazine gives a warm feeling but unless we take the risk of trying, of standing up to a boss, teach a difficult lesson and win the students over, put into practice what we read, then we lose out and esteem goes down - our own and the people around us.
I realise I had a mother that had faith in me to go into risky situations - cross London on the tube at age 11 with one parent in Paris and the other in B'ham - no one I knew within 100 miles.
No wonder I've been a risk taker all my life.
What we really need are parents and teachers that know us well and are close enough to be able to set us challenges that match are present abilities. Rather the time spent cooking the parents a meal than spending an hour on a social networking site.
At present I'm all for supporting parents and encouraging them to take the well thought out risks their parents didn't allow them to take!
Risk facing up to their children and encouraging them to take real risks - that of a meal they prepared being a flop! (and being praised by their parents for daring to try)!
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